Killer Bee

Roybob’s Book on Golf: The Hucks, A Golfer’s Divine Comedy, and a Religious Philosophy of Golf

Huck Tales


Killer Bee

The eleventh at Golden Eagle is a short par four, but it can be very challenging. A bunker runs down the left side of the fairway all the way to the green; and, left of the bunker, is Lake Blue Herron which also extends to the green. Even more menacing, about where normal people would hit their drive, the bunker has a big, steep finger that runs across most of the fairway. Big hitters can drive their ball over the bunker and have a little sand wedge left. Mere mortals must lay up on their tee balls with a four metal or less.

Joe is a big hitter, and one day, playing with Ninja, Fuji, J.K., and Ricky Bobby, Joe was trying to drive his ball over the bunker that runs across the fairway. The length is not problematic for Joe. I have seen him come close to driving the eleventh green, and it is a 378-yard hole. On this occasion, however, Joe pulled it left of the fairway bunker and into the water’s edge.

Joe had a shot, but he had to stand in Lake Blue Herron. Never one to back down from a challenge, Joe removed his shoes and socks and ventured into the lake. Up to his knees in water, Joe hit the shot (not a good one) and stumbled out of the lake. Then, he began to hop around and screech in manner one seldom hears from an Army Ranger. He was in pain and exclaimed that his bare big toe had been stung by a bee. I will not record the expletives that issued from his mouth, but one can image the extensive and highly expressive vocabulary that comes with an education from the United States Military Academy.

As the others began to question his manhood, after hearing his shrieks of agony, Joe explained, “You don’t understand; that hurt like a mother fucker! My toe is turning black. That must have been a killer bee!” Ninja, an Annapolis grad and, thus, a Navy man, walked by Joe, shook his head and said, “Fucking Army pussy.” Joe did not find the humor, but the rest of the boys had a good laugh.

Roybob’s Book on Golf: The Hucks, A Golfer’s Divine Comedy, and a Religious Philosophy of Golf

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